Every family has problems and challenges. But successful families try to work together toward solutions instead of resorting to criticism and contention. They pray for each other, discuss, and give encouragement. Ezra Taft Benson

Thursday, September 6, 2018

Lesson 11
Fidelity in Marriage
In speaking of fidelity in marriage I am one of those that appreciates the positive side of the coin. Of course, all kinds of heartache and pain come with infidelity, but we don’t want to tamper with poison. So my question is can we stay away from the temptation so that it is not a temptation? I really liked what Goddard said in his book. Mentioning 10 step of staying safe from temptations, it was number eight that I thought was so perfect “Don't set yourself up for failure. Don't allow yourself to spend time alone with the person. Avoiding is better than resisting. Make your spouse a partner in all of your efforts to help a person of the opposite sex.” I believe that is being a guardian over ourselves and our marriage. Don’t go looking for trouble.

I don’t want to be tempted. I also really enjoy the steps to stay faithful! I like dates and praying with my spouse. I like talking through things with him. I love just being with him. I feel it is dangerous for me to compare him to anyone or how he should be. I feel what I read, watch, and listen to all make an impact on how I feel about my husband.

My husband was a Bishop for six years and said he learned both from study and experience that often the problem of pornography came into a marriage because the wife was being selfish and proud and so the husband was weak and vulnerable. Of course, you cannot blame the wife for her husband’s poor choices- but what if she could have strengthened him and kept him safe if she would have been more thoughtful, kind, and humble. My husband said I have kept all other temptations from him.

The wonderful closeness in a marriage is not available to many, so what about them? I appreciate Bro Goddard who said, “Sometimes He requires us to bear discomfort. But He always blesses those who obey eternal laws. And the blessings are in incredible disproportion to the price we have paid.” Isn’t that true for every commandment? I am grateful for President Kimball’s reminder “The words none else eliminate everyone and everything. The spouse then becomes preeminent in the life of the husband or wife, and neither social life nor occupational life nor political life nor any other interest nor person nor thing shall ever take precedence over the companion spouse.” 
Some marriages can be healed in this life but some will not. My heart goes out to family members and friends however I hope they take courage. "To those who claim their love is dead, let them return home with all their loyalty, fidelity, honor, and cleanness, and the love that has become but embers will flare up with scintillating flame again. If love wanes or dies, it is often infidelity of thought or act that gave the lethal potion."
Our job is to keep our covenants and do all we can to learn and serve and bless our spouse and make it possible for them to live happily ever after with us.


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